i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
