arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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