How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Randomize
