I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize