when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I'm at about main and main street
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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