You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize