Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
