I can tuck mytits in my pants
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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