I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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