If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
