A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
