last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
