She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
