Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
