Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize