how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
it hurts more in the daytime
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Randomize
