He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
