thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
