Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
