well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
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