i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize