That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize