Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Randomize
