I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
