yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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