Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
