brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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