Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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