Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
