I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Randomize
