So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
