We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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