I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
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