i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
