The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
