I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize