The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
