Please, let me fuck your mom
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
