hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize