It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
