You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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