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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  No. You're kidding.

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up

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• (817): View more from Texas

  And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.

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• (442): View more from California

  While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  "I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating

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