there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
birth control should be required to get into college
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
