Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
