I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Randomize
