I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
