He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
