going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
