Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
