I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
